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FAN FICTION
"The Complete Films of Gary Grant"
By Donna Moore


Those ebay bidders amongst you may have missed this http://cgi.ebay.com/aw-cgi/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=342318114 in your search for Cary. This is obviously a book about Cary's lesser known twin brother Gary Grant (or Urchie Leach as he was once known) ... Donna

Thanks Donna, I bid on this book, I want to see if Gary is anything like his brother Cary... you never know they may slip a pic or to of the famous brother in there.... Debby 

Great! I'm glad you found it, despite the fact that it was hiding under the name Gary :o) It made me laugh, especially the descriptions bit which kept referring to 'Gary'. Actually, I've dug into this further, and here are The Complete Films of Gary Grant, complete with brief synopsis:

THIS IS THE FIGHT - Gary meets Rocky Balboa and knocks him sensible 

DINNERS IN THE SUN - Gary goes on holiday and the weather's so nice he can eat outdoors. 

MERRILY WE GO TO NELL - Gary and his mates visit a lady of ill repute 

THE DEVIL AND THE JEEP - Someone's stolen Gary's prized car - who can it be? 

BLONDE MENUS - Only fair haired people can eat in Gary's new restaurant 

NOT SATURDAY - Gary wakes up and unfortunately he has to go to work because it's not Saturday 

MADAME NUTTERFLY - Gary's girlfriend has an unfortunate encounter with a matter transmitter and ends up as a mad fly. 

SHE SPUN HIM WRONG - Gary's girlfriend can't dance 

ROMAN ACCUSED - Gary pretends to be Spartacus 

THE BAGLE AND THE HAWK - A hungry bird swoops down and takes Gary's breakfast RAMBLING SHIP - Gary rescues passengers on a boat which has gone badly off course. I'M NO ANGLE - Gary demonstrates his soft curves 

MALICE IN WONDERLAND - The Mad Hatter spreads nasty rumours about Gary 

THIRTY LAY PRINCESS - Gary reads the news headlines in the National Enquirer 

BORN TO BE MAD - Gary discovers he's a descendent of the Emperor Caligula MISSING MAKE UP - Gary turns detective when his girlfriend's cosmetic bag goes missing 

LADIES SHOULD GLISTEN - Gary opens up a ladies gym 

RENT A MADAM - Gary employs a posh cleaning lady 

THINGS IN THE DARK - Gary bumps his leg on the table when the electricity goes off 

THE FAST OUTPOST - Gary opens up a MacDonalds Franchise in the Outer Mongolia 

SYLVIA STARLET - Gary gets involved with a would be actress. Called Sylvia. 

BIG BROWN PIES - Gary burns the dinner again 

BOOZY - Gary has too much to drink 

BEDDING PRESENT - Gary's mum buys him a new quilt 

WHEN YOU'RE IN GLOVE - Gary keeps his hands warm in winter ROMANCE AND BRITCHES - A costume drama 

HOPPER - Gary sees the ghost of his dead frog ROAST OF NEW YORK - Gary cooks a prizewinning piece of beef 

THE AWFUL RUTH - Gary's nasty friend Ruth causes problems for our hero 

STRINGING UP BABY - A leopard escapes from the zoo and is caught by two schoolboys who tie it to the park gates. 

POLLY DAY - Gary buys a new parrot 

GUNG HO BIN - Gary's rubbish bin behaves very oddly 

ONLY ANGELS HAVE RINGS - A new law is passed regarding the wearing of jewelry 

IN SHAME ONLY - Gary goes out without getting dressed and is covered in shame only HIS GIRL'S FRY DAY - Gary's girlfriend decides to cook only fried eggs on Wednesday 

MY FAVOURITE KNIFE - Gary discusses his most prized cutlery items 

THE COWARDS OF VIRGINIA - A whole American State suddenly becomes very fearful when they discover that the Awful Ruth is coming to town 

THE PHILADELPHIA GORY - A horror story set in Pennsylvania 

DENNY SERENADE - A musical about a fast food outlet 

SUSPENSION - Gary returns to his home town of Bristol and walks across the bridge 

TALK OF THE GOWN - Gary's girlfriend dithers over buying a new frock ONCE UPON A FUNNY MOON - Gary discovers the moon really is made of green cheese 

MR MUCKY - Gary gets involved in a mud wrestling bout 

INFESTATION TOKYO - Gary helps when the residents of a Japanese town are plagued by cockroaches 

ONCE UPON A MIME - Gary meets Marcel Marceau 

NONE BUT THE LONELY TART - Gary discovers that his tea plate is looking decidedly bare and only one cake remains 

ARSENIC AND OLD GRACE - Gary's neighbour Grace names her cat Arsenic 

KNIGHT AND DAY - Gary plays Mr Knight, who falls in love with Miss Day 

NO TOES NEAR US - Gary and his girlfriend discover they have an aversion to feet. 

THE BACHELOR AND THE FLABBY BOXER - Gary becomes a trainer for an overweight fighter 

THE BISHOP'S STRIFE - Gary plays a troubled bishop 

MR BLANDINGS BUILDS HIS TREE HOUSE - Jim Blandings decides to move out of the family home 

EVERY GIRL SHOULD BE CARRIED - Just a personal thought by Donna 

I WAS A PALE SORE BRIDE - Gary's new wife trips at the altar and hurts her knee but she bravely goes through with the ceremony anyway. 

CRY SIS - Gary torments his baby sister until she bursts into tears 

PEOPLE WILL WALK - A town bans cars and buses 

GROOM FOR ONE MORE - Gary becomes a bigamist 

DONKEY BUSINESS - Gary sells donkey rides on a Spanish beach 

DREAM KNIFE - A sequel to MY FAVOURITE KNIFE, Gary shows us more favourites from his cutlery drawer 

TO CATCH A BRIEF - Gary puts on his running shoes to track down a lawyer 

THE FRIED AND THE PASSION - Gary develops a real taste for French Fries A FLARE TO REMEMBER - Gary reminisces on the fashion statements of the 1970s 

DISS THEM FOR ME - Gary disrespects all wooden actresses, and Suzy Parker in particular 

IN THIS SHEET - Gary goes to a toga party SAUCEBOAT - Gary's culinary skills come to the fore again 

EAST BY SOUTHWEST - Gary gets completely lost on a trip to Mount Rushmore 

OPERATION BETTY'S GOAT - Gary becomes a vet 

THE GLASS IS CLEANER - Gary's new cleaning lady is really good with windows 

THAT TOUCH OF KINK - Gary has a perm which goes horribly wrong 

CHERRYADE - Gary's favourite drink gets its own film

FATHER'S LOOSE - A mad dad goes on the rampage 

TALK, DON'T RUN - Gary discovers that he's let himself go and can't run and talk at the same time


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